I am not angry, just disappointed? I don't know. Does it really matter? Someone taught me something recently I've known for years, but never truly felt. And I guess the reason I didn't feel it had a lot to do with my insecurity. But what I was taught, was that no matter how long friends are parted they are still and always will be a part of each other's lives. Some friends grow apart, some can be apart for years and when they see each other it's like they were never apart. I guess that has to do a lot with connection, on both sides. I just disappointed with someone I thought I was getting close to, getting to know and suddenly disappeared. I know I should just cut loses and turn to people that have time and want to connect. I don't give up on people that easily though. Good for me or not it's not part of who I am. I might be flighty, but I am not a quitter. Bah, I am also to romantic for my own good so that being distant or alof really pulls my strings and pushes buttons.
This entry was actually ment as my indirect way of letting them know even though they might not have contacted me in a while, I am still here, and I am still waiting, and I still want to be your friend. I am not going away and I am not going to disappear, I am here when you're ready.
11:39 am - 10.10.2003
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